she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
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i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
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And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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