the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
porn star boner night. come get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize