Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.