I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?