Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?