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Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
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