Best Nights of the Month

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!

  (240): View more from Maryland

  it expires tomorrow

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.

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  21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (713): View more from Texas

  You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.

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• (310): View more from California

  I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!

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  23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (701): View more from North Dakota

  I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?

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• (260): View more from Indiana

  You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  How are you feeling today?

  (1-405): View more from Oklahoma

  Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.

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