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So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
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