I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.