Texts From Last Night

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  (646): View more from New York

  Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.

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  (646): Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her. http://tfl.nu/s0ys
  Replies (4) Good night (1283) Bad night (100)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.

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  (801): walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home. http://tfl.nu/tt4s
  Replies (6) Good night (1165) Bad night (107)
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  (949): View more from California

  I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.

  (702): View more from Nevada

  It's like the whiskey god was watching over you

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  (949): I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id. (702): It's like the whiskey god was watching over you http://tfl.nu/wgp4
  Replies (5) Good night (1078) Bad night (112)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.

  (602): View more from Arizona

  What other scale is there?

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  (480): While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale. (602): What other scale is there? http://tfl.nu/fdnh
  Replies (15) Good night (1055) Bad night (136)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.

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  (207): I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine.... (617): This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs. http://tfl.nu/5fub
  Replies (10) Good night (973) Bad night (215)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.

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  (210): you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug. http://tfl.nu/nztu
  Replies (7) Good night (922) Bad night (91) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.

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  (406): I would watch the shit out of some full house right now. http://tfl.nu/5ksj
  Replies (6) Good night (906) Bad night (173) Order T-Shirt
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  (903): View more from Texas

  All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.

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  (903): All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed. http://tfl.nu/pos0
  Replies (2) Good night (886) Bad night (105) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS

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  (541): THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS http://tfl.nu/c3uu
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.

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  (541): I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore. http://tfl.nu/k0jx
  Replies (5) Good night (740) Bad night (108) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?

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  (719): If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies? http://tfl.nu/dbdn
  Replies (7) Good night (723) Bad night (127) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department

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  (404): Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department http://tfl.nu/p2zv
  Replies (4) Good night (628) Bad night (101) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am

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  (773): despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am http://tfl.nu/0kp9
  Replies (1) Good night (535) Bad night (227) Order T-Shirt
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  (650): View more from California

  It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.

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  (650): It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag. http://tfl.nu/hxfk
  Replies (2) Good night (436) Bad night (137) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.

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  (865): If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan. http://tfl.nu/8pg6
  Replies (1) Good night (384) Bad night (139) Order T-Shirt