Porn is love you can see.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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