Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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