You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize