dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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