Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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