just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
