You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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