Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
