my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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