I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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