Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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