the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
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