how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
