Already got asked if we're dating
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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