is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
