Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
