There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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