i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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