So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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