so that wasnt chicken after all
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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