Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
