Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize