I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
