reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
