I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
birth control should be required to get into college
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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