this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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