You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
4 words: hood of his car
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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