chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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