Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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