If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
