I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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