i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
