just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize