I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
