some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I'm too high and old for this...
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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