She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
40s are totally the cure
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
