maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
