the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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