the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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