My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
how do flat chested girls get laid?
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
