he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
