we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
It's Friday. Sex?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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